Parenting - Work In Progress

Hey Mom Harsha, 
I tried everything that you mentioned.
Patience, self-talk, everything but nothing works.
My children are still stubborn, and don't listen to me.
throw tantrums etc etc etc etc.
What to do?
Well, Rome was not built in a day.
So, miracles will take time.
Not in 1 week, not in 1 month, they will take time. 
You have to be consistent, consistent and 

believe me, results will come.

One - Mantra 

There is no such thing as Perfect Parenting if you understand this half of our problems will automatically vanish.

The problem is when we want to be perfect. 
Parenting is a journey, an ongoing process, where you solve one problem another arises.

Age, Stage, and Phases

• Newborn 
• Infant
• Toddler
• Preschooler
• School-age 
• Adolescent
• Adults
• Old age

Every age has a phase. at every stage of the child, at every milestone of a child's journey nature and behavior, keep changing.
The struggles, issue, and problem that the parent phase with the child is very temporary.

It's the phase of the child's life.

If we understand this simple logic parenting journey will become relaxing.
but but but ..... 

One thing to keep in mind is that you solve one problem, another is waiting in the clue and the line is very long. 

When we become parents, we are totally unaware and clueless about this journey.

We have dreamt of parenthood, where children are cuddly babies but the reality is totally opposite. (Just like the picture pasted above)

We as parents have to continuously evolve with time. Every phase of a child's life is a learning process for us. 

If we learn & evolve each time with that learning, the parenting journey will become enjoyable. Many times we try so many tricks & technics to improve our child's behavior, but hardly we are successful, 
why ??? 
A very very old saying says - 
children learn by actions and not by words.
Read this quote again, pause for a while, and reflect.

 
You will definitely agree with this.

This is a slow process but effective and long-lasting.

What we do is - we want our children to change and we want ourselves to be the same - 

this will never work. 

Practice what you preach - Preach what you practice, 

because children are watching you more, than listening to you.

We all want our children to be well-behaved, well-mannered, and well-disciplined, for this, we keep on trying so many things.

we read books, we listen to experts, we talk to our friends & family and so many other things.
we have so much information, advice, techniques, tips, etc. few are just rubbish, a few a good to listen to but not workable, and a few are workable but ......

so what to do ??? 

The most important thing is, to change anything in children - 

we have to change first, because - 

You can't pour an empty cup

For children to change, 
start making some changes in yourself.

• How you think 
• How you talk
• How you behave
• How you react 
• How you respond

What you do 

• When you are angry 
• When sad 
• When happy

How you deal with situations etc.....

Children learn from whole of the above, this learning is automatic and your words cannot change it. 

Warning - 

Be Mindful of how you behave because those little eyes are watching you.

Your children and their behaviors will not change in a day, it will take your consistent efforts.
If you missed out on maintaining consistency, you are back to square one.
Try this Rome Technique 

The Rome Technique : 

R - Reasonable, Ready
be very reasonable in your expectations and always be ready to see if things don't go or happen as expected.
Be calm and consistent in your efforts.

O - Open-minded, Okay
be open-minded to accepting changes and try to be okay. we are parenting GenZ kids.
Be calm and consistent in your efforts.

M - Model, Mindful
you are a role model for your children, they love copying you, so be mindful that you model the best version of yourself each time.
Be calm and consistent in your efforts.

E - Easygoing, Energetic

don't be hard either on your selves or on your children, be easygoing. parenting needs lots and lots of energy so be energetic always.
Be calm and consistent in your efforts.

Children will change but not in a day remember Rome was not built in a day.