Why don't children listen to their Parents.
**My
Children Don’t Listen to Me Attentively — What Should I Do?
By Mom Harsha**
Every mother has felt this at some point:
“Why don’t my children listen to me carefully?”
I felt the same… until one day a small moment changed
my whole perspective on listening, communication, and connection.
Let me take you into that moment.
The Moment That Stopped Me
I was in the kitchen, busy chopping vegetables while
mentally running through the day’s tasks.
Suddenly, my child came running:
“Mumma! You know what happened today?”
Without even thinking, I said,
“Haan beta, bolo…”
But my eyes were still on the stove.
My hands were still busy.
My mind was still half-lost somewhere else.
After a few seconds of silence, my child softly said:
“Mumma, you’re not listening properly…”
That line hit hard.
It was a mirror.
A truth I could not ignore.
I switched off the stove, turned to my child, bent
down, and said:
“I’m listening now. Tell me properly. I want to hear
it.”
And in that moment, something shifted — inside me, and
inside my child.
The Question That Changed My Parenting
That night, while lying on my bed, I asked myself:
“When my children come to share something…
How do I listen?”
Do I stop?
Do I look at them?
Do I give them my eyes, ears, and presence?
Mostly, the answer was no.
Like many moms, I was always multitasking.
And then it hit me:
👉 Children learn how to listen by watching how
we listen.
If I am a half-listener,
they will become half-listeners too.
If I am distracted,
they will grow up to be distracted.
If I say “Haan bolo” while staring at my phone,
that’s exactly what they will do to me later.
Listening is not taught.
It is modelled.
Why Children Don’t Listen — A Mom’s Real Insight
I understood something simple, human, and practical:
1. Kids don’t feel heard enough.
And when someone doesn’t feel heard, they stop
listening too.
2. We give too many instructions at once.
Their attention gets scattered.
3. They imitate our style of listening.
We are their first mirror.
4. Their brain is still developing.
Listening is a practice, not an inborn habit.
**So
What Can We Do as Moms?
Here’s what I started doing — and it truly helped.**
I’m sharing this with all honesty, from one mom’s heart
to another.
1. I Pause When They Come to Talk
Even for 5 seconds.
If I’m busy, I say:
“Give me one moment, I want to listen to you properly.”
This small line tells them that they matter.
2. I Make Eye Contact
Now when my kids speak, I look into their eyes.
I often tell them:
“Talk to me… I want to see your face while you tell
this.”
This simple act builds trust, calmness, and attention.
3. I Put My Phone Aside — Deliberately
And I say it out loud:
“I’m keeping my phone down because I want to hear you.”
Children understand what they see, not what we preach.
4. I Use the Power of Touch
A hand on the shoulder.
A small hug.
A gentle hold on their hand.
I say:
“Come here… tell me now.”
Their mind settles, their heart opens, and their ears
follow.
5. I Give One Instruction at a Time
Instead of:
“Do this, then that, then that…”
Now I say:
“First keep the book. Then come to me.”
Clear. Calm. Effective.
6. I Lower My Voice Instead of Raising It
This changed everything.
When they get loud, I speak softly.
I whisper sometimes:
“Listen to me for a moment.”
They automatically stop to hear me.
7. I Appreciate Their Listening
Whenever they listen well, I say:
“I loved how you listened the first time.”
Children repeat behaviour that gets noticed.
A
Small Story from My Home
One evening, I was typing an important message.
My child said:
“Mumma, I want to show you something.”
I replied, eyes still on my phone:
“Haan haan, show me…”
He didn’t.
He quietly walked away.
Something felt wrong inside me.
I got up, went to him and said:
“I’m sorry. I wasn’t listening properly.
Can you show me again? I want to see it.”
His entire expression changed.
He took my hand, smiling, and showed me a tiny drawing.
That day I realised:
A child doesn’t need a perfect mother.
A child needs a present mother.
And a present mother creates a present child.
What
Changed in My Children
After I began listening intentionally:
●
They listen more calmly
●
They respond with more focus
●
They look into my eyes while speaking
●
They follow instructions better
●
They express emotions openly
●
They repeat the behaviour I model
The home atmosphere has become softer, smoother —
beautiful.
Not because I became stricter,
but because I became more present.
My
Heartfelt Message to Every Mom Reading This
Your child is not ignoring you.
Your child is not “bad at listening.”
Your child is not careless.
They are simply waiting.
Waiting to be seen.
Waiting to be heard.
Waiting for your eyes, your pause, your presence.
Listening is not about ears.
It is about love.
When you listen with your heart,
your child listens with theirs.
“The moment we pause to listen, our children begin to
hear us.”
— Mom Harsha
**My
Children Don’t Listen to Me Attentively — What Should I Do?
By Mom Harsha**
Every mother has felt this at some point:
“Why don’t my children listen to me carefully?”
I felt the same… until one day a small moment changed
my whole perspective on listening, communication, and connection.
Let me take you into that moment.
The Moment That Stopped Me
I was in the kitchen, busy chopping vegetables while
mentally running through the day’s tasks.
Suddenly, my child came running:
“Mumma! You know what happened today?”
Without even thinking, I said,
“Haan beta, bolo…”
But my eyes were still on the stove.
My hands were still busy.
My mind was still half-lost somewhere else.
After a few seconds of silence, my child softly said:
“Mumma, you’re not listening properly…”
That line hit hard.
It was a mirror.
A truth I could not ignore.
I switched off the stove, turned to my child, bent
down, and said:
“I’m listening now. Tell me properly. I want to hear
it.”
And in that moment, something shifted — inside me, and
inside my child.
The Question That Changed My Parenting
That night, while lying on my bed, I asked myself:
“When my children come to share something…
How do I listen?”
Do I stop?
Do I look at them?
Do I give them my eyes, ears, and presence?
Mostly, the answer was no.
Like many moms, I was always multitasking.
And then it hit me:
👉 Children learn how to listen by watching how
we listen.
If I am a half-listener,
they will become half-listeners too.
If I am distracted,
they will grow up to be distracted.
If I say “Haan bolo” while staring at my phone,
that’s exactly what they will do to me later.
Listening is not taught.
It is modelled.
Why Children Don’t Listen — A Mom’s Real Insight
I understood something simple, human, and practical:
1. Kids don’t feel heard enough.
And when someone doesn’t feel heard, they stop
listening too.
2. We give too many instructions at once.
Their attention gets scattered.
3. They imitate our style of listening.
We are their first mirror.
4. Their brain is still developing.
Listening is a practice, not an inborn habit.
**So
What Can We Do as Moms?
Here’s what I started doing — and it truly helped.**
I’m sharing this with all honesty, from one mom’s heart
to another.
1. I Pause When They Come to Talk
Even for 5 seconds.
If I’m busy, I say:
“Give me one moment, I want to listen to you properly.”
This small line tells them that they matter.
2. I Make Eye Contact
Now when my kids speak, I look into their eyes.
I often tell them:
“Talk to me… I want to see your face while you tell
this.”
This simple act builds trust, calmness, and attention.
3. I Put My Phone Aside — Deliberately
And I say it out loud:
“I’m keeping my phone down because I want to hear you.”
Children understand what they see, not what we preach.
4. I Use the Power of Touch
A hand on the shoulder.
A small hug.
A gentle hold on their hand.
I say:
“Come here… tell me now.”
Their mind settles, their heart opens, and their ears
follow.
5. I Give One Instruction at a Time
Instead of:
“Do this, then that, then that…”
Now I say:
“First keep the book. Then come to me.”
Clear. Calm. Effective.
6. I Lower My Voice Instead of Raising It
This changed everything.
When they get loud, I speak softly.
I whisper sometimes:
“Listen to me for a moment.”
They automatically stop to hear me.
7. I Appreciate Their Listening
Whenever they listen well, I say:
“I loved how you listened the first time.”
Children repeat behaviour that gets noticed.
A
Small Story from My Home
One evening, I was typing an important message.
My child said:
“Mumma, I want to show you something.”
I replied, eyes still on my phone:
“Haan haan, show me…”
He didn’t.
He quietly walked away.
Something felt wrong inside me.
I got up, went to him and said:
“I’m sorry. I wasn’t listening properly.
Can you show me again? I want to see it.”
His entire expression changed.
He took my hand, smiling, and showed me a tiny drawing.
That day I realised:
A child doesn’t need a perfect mother.
A child needs a present mother.
And a present mother creates a present child.
What
Changed in My Children
After I began listening intentionally:
●
They listen more calmly
●
They respond with more focus
●
They look into my eyes while speaking
●
They follow instructions better
●
They express emotions openly
●
They repeat the behaviour I model
The home atmosphere has become softer, smoother —
beautiful.
Not because I became stricter,
but because I became more present.
My
Heartfelt Message to Every Mom Reading This
Your child is not ignoring you.
Your child is not “bad at listening.”
Your child is not careless.
They are simply waiting.
Waiting to be seen.
Waiting to be heard.
Waiting for your eyes, your pause, your presence.
Listening is not about ears.
It is about love.
When you listen with your heart,
your child listens with theirs.
“The moment we pause to listen, our children begin to
hear us.”
— Mom Harsha
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